2023 Author: Cody Thornton | [email protected]. Last modified: 2023-05-24 11:20
After the slamming without appeal of the noble Enoteca Pinchiorri in Florence, there is no peace for Federico F. Ferrero, the winner of Masterchef 3 now recycled food critic.
Excuse us so much, Federico Effe Ferrero, but one wonders why it all happens to you, why you are capable of attracting the ire or even just the bad days of chefs and maître, or rather maîtresse.
Manco da Uliassi suits you. Uliassi, two Michelin star restaurant acclaimed by enthusiasts for the excellent seafood and also for the precise and courteous service.
To you, on the other hand, one does not go straight: you come from Mauro Uliassi, in the beautiful white and blue chalet by the sea, and what happens to you?
Immediately they give you a foie gras and hazelnut wafer, a raw Ascolana olive with an almond bone inside and a piece of dry bread with a poor anchovy and a bit of truffle, black to top it off! But most of all without even asking yourself if you liked these delicacies or not not exactly vegan or vegetarian, as we all are today.
But the worst is yet to come.
It is not known how, you can also attract the resentment of the hostess and sister of Mauro, Catia Uliassi, which many do not hesitate to define affable and courteous, as well as beautiful (not bad). To you instead, look a bit, he manages to slam the wine list on the table with bad grace and to order you peremptorily "choose the wine you want from here!"
But your revenge is fine, and you carry it out by flaunting your ways in the national newspaper (La Stampa), so to speak, "briskly", certainly not up to the name Uliassi. It seems that the thug didn't even manage to suggest a "coherent path with some simple requests".
If you then add, a little treacherous, that “the sommelier , INSTEAD very kind, it makes you forget the rudeness of the hostess ", you understand that next time the wine list, INSTEAD that on the table, the lady of the house will throw it directly in your face, and perhaps she will not be completely wrong. Perhaps.
It's not all. In the ruinous evening, you will also arrive, in order:
- an oyster butter that is "an algid unscratchable stone"
- the "parallelepiped of sea bass with a cold and raw heart"
- "invasive garlic in a lethal dose for any vampire", - the wine, not even the right one, or as you say in your golden lexicon, which "does not embody the agreed winemaking style", and moreover served at a thrilling temperature of 4 degrees while the label on display shows a serving temperature of 15 degrees
- an amberjack alla puttanesca that looks like mom's pizzaiola
- a grilled turbot, vacuum-packed and which the type of preservation has “robbed of all emotion”.
You want to try to recover with the sole alla maître d'hotel, "wrapped in a crunchy and golden breading, sweet and enveloping, in a greedy dialogue with the flavored butter, whipped in a soft foam" or with the extraordinary pleasure of cuttlefish roasted!
Moreover, I am not satisfied with the urbi et orbi diffusion of this massacre, you also come out with the c affè that arrives 25 minutes after the request, and here in my opinion there is again, this time malicious, the hand of the landlady, who already seeing you enter had understood that that evening would be badly marked for her.
Dear Federico Effe Ferrero, the job of a food critic involves risks, and if it is true that your "slightly opinionated" ways manage to magnetize the antipathies of the universe, it is also legitimate that the things you report, if they really happened - as we have no reason to doubt - they cry out for vengeance.
The average 100/135 euros paid out to eat in this enchanting place are certainly not the minimum 250/300 euros spent at Massimo Bottura's Osteria Francescana, but they are not even the tourist menu at 35 euros. Especially when this menu comes to you, with bad grace and bad words, slammed on the table.
Was it really like that?